What's up with Kool-Aid Man?

So, I recently noticed that Kool-Aid Man has started wearing pants.  That got me to thinking: do we live in such a politically correct society that a talking pitcher of Kool-Aid needs to wear pants?  I mean, what are we afraid we might see?  His ice cubes...

Manhole Covers: A cautionary tale

"Why I Avoid Manhole Covers"

     My wife once asked me why I avoid manhole covers when we went for our daily walks. So, I told her about an incident in high school.

 

     On one particular day, my buddy (we’ll call him Sam) thought it would be fun to leap on the manhole cover that lay nearby. As he jumped on it, the cover flipped up and he landed funny. Immediately, Sam leapt up and grabbed his ”tenderest of tenders”. He was howling and I was laughing with tears in my eyes. When he was able to regain his composure, we continued our walk with Sam moving at a slower speed. The next day at school, Sam was absent. I learned later that he actually cut his tenderest of tenders and was taken to the hospital for stitches.

 

      After I told my wife that tale, she agreed that we should never step on manhole covers.

 

I posted this on a Reader's Digest Facebook contest.  Basically, you have to write a 150 word story about your life (or something in your life).  So feel free to enter one of your own stories (and possibly win $25,000 to boot).  Or, you could vote for mine by going to:  Why I avoid manhole covers

The Trinity turns one month old!

Perhaps not the biggest milestone but a milestone nonetheless.  My first novel is now one month old.  Being a proud parent, I have included acceptable birthday presents:

1.  Diapers (always need these)
2.  Binkies (almost as necessary as diapers)
3.  Toys (not THOSE kinds of toys you perverts...)
4.  Blankets
5.  Clothes
6.  Baby Food
7.  Cash

I have a registry set up for all major retail stores in the country so feel free to pick and choose from the given list or just surprise me!

On a more serious note, if you haven't gotten a chance to read The Trinity...what are you waiting for!?!  It even has it's own website now!

The Trinity Webiste

I've submitted the story to a publisher...but got rejected.  Oh well.  It's a big ocean out there and I've just set my toe into the water (so to speak).

Knuckles Bleeding

I typically don't write poetry but this idea sprang into my mind after seeing a mistake on a computer screen at work.  Of course, after examining this poem further I keep thinking of Sonic The Hedgehog and his pal Knuckles (video game reference for those who don't know what I'm talking about).  This is not about a video game duo.  It's loosely based on a fight I got into back in middle school.  Enjoy!

Knuckles, knuckles bleeding
"You should see the other guy"
A school yard fight turned bloody
A man asks "Are you ok?"

The bullies ran away
When the sedan pulled up
He stood there in a daze
Wondering how this came to be

Walking home with friends
Trumpet case in hand
Three kids yelled at them
"Nerds, dork, fags"

His two friends fled
He stood his ground
The first punch thrown
But he chose to stay

The first kid goes down
From a roundhouse punch
The second makes a retreat
The third grabs a 2x4

Distracted for a moment
He felt a blow to the back
Whirling around
He sees the wooden plank

Using his trumpet case
Like a warrior's shield
He blocks the next blow
As the sedan pulls up

"Hey" the balding man cried
The bullies running away
He stands his ground
Looking around in a daze

"Are you okay?"
He does not respond
Walking down the road
His knuckles bleeding